“Your Highness” reaches new lows

The mood has struck, you need a movie; and fast. You’re looking for something classy, artistic, meaningful, and something your whole family can enjoy. I think I’ve just stumbled upon a film that’s the exact opposite of what I just described.

I have a lot of mixed feelings about “Your Highness.” A part of me believes I just watched the worst movie of all time, yet another part of me feels like it achieves greatness for that reason. It is apparent, and slightly ironic given its name, that “Your Highness” sinks to the lowest depths of film comedy once you realize most of the jokes revolve around a certain part of the male body, with most of the punchlines sounding like they were written by a few stoned and giggling nerds in junior high.

The plot revolves around the lazy and hard-partying Thadeous (Danny Mcbride), who lives in the constant shadow of his much more dashing and heroic older brother, Fabious (James Franco). All is well and merry until Fabious’ beloved fiancee is kidnapped by an evil wizard who intends to steal her virginity when the two moons align in order to summon a dragon or something. Yeah. It makes about as much sense as it sounds, but the plot is just barely tight enough to work.

The movie feels more like a fantasy film than a comedy, with its heavy use of special effects. While creative, some scenes are pretty corny and cheap looking, so at times you feel like you’re watching one of those lame made-for-TV movies on the Sci-Fi Network. A part of me feels like this was intentional, but even so, it wouldn’t quite make up for it.

Featuring an uncharacteristically big-named cast, the performances in this film can be interpreted rather differently depending upon your perspective. To the more classy, art house-type critic, the actors are merely phoning in their ridiculous lines with their quick paycheck in mind. However, to other, more open-minded, probably more immature audiences, the actors appear to be having a pretty good time up on screen.

Most of the performances are humorously bad, including the always stunning Natalie Portman, whose British accent is equally stunning. She plays the cliché “strong/independent” woman warrior Isabel, whose parents were slaughtered by the same dude who kidnapped Fabious’s fiancée. This essentially makes her a more annoying Batman, which offends me on several levels. I can’t quite tell whether this is a case of a good actress acting badly on purpose, or a good actress just acting badly.

I hope Danny McBride, who co-wrote the film, recognizes that he wrote his own character to be pretty unlikable. Most of the lame jokes come from him, and I feel like his performance was the least desirable of the whole cast.

His bowl-cutted manservant, Courtney (Rasmus Hardiker), on the other hand, stole many a scene with his charming lack of intelligence and hilarious facial expressions; hopefully, this role nets him more work in the future.

The best performance ironically comes from the actor who appears to put in the least amount of effort. James Franco, fresh from his Oscar-nominated performance in “127 hours,” delivers a rather… interesting performance in “Your Highness.” I’m not one to jump to any conclusions, but I’m pretty sure he was high during most of the shooting, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing for viewers.

He delivers his lines with all the energy of an average sloth, and the constant threat of breaking into giggles is pretty obvious. Normally, I would describe this as totally unprofessional, but in this case it kind of works. I found his deadpan and apathetic style very entertaining, albeit pretty ridiculous.

It took me a while to realize that what makes “Your Highness” awful also makes it somewhat beautiful. It’s a “so bad it’s good” type of film of the highest order, and I would recommend it to any person who is willing to leave his brain at home for a while and share some immature, but satisfying laughs with a friend.